I'm So Grateful You Didn't Roll Your Eyes
and also for otters and fountain pens shaped like sharks
Happy October.
Remember way back when in the nascent days of this newsletter, when I suggested that the easiest way to create a daily practice would be to start the day with a glass of lemon water.
I was wrong. There is an easier way to set yourself on a path of a daily practice and increase your sense of well-being and overall health. It’s best performed in bed before you sleep or while you’re still in bed in the morning. There’s no special breathing technique to learn, no bodily contortions. Just you and your brain. And we’re going to explore it this month.
I’ll admit, I’ve gone back and forth about this month’s theme several times. Some days I was all for it. Other days I was all nah. But, in the end, I’m going for it.
Welcome to our October theme, one of the easiest concepts to introduce into your daily practice, and yet, the most eye roll inducing aspect of daily routines and wellness initiatives: gratitude.
As in, “tell me about your gratitude practice.”
As in, “I’ll write it in my gratitude journal.”
As in, “My gratitude practice really changed my life.”
See, you just did it. You rolled your eyes at least three times, one after each statement.
On one teeny-tiny level, I can kind of see why. It can sound so preachy and sanctimonious, “My. Gratitude. Practice.”
Don’t we all say thank you? Aren’t we all grateful? Actually, no.
I send thank you letters (or at least an email, or a text message). I tip 15%. It’s bigger than that.
So, I humbly ask you to put your eye-roll to the side and offer up one to three minutes of your daily practice to a little bit of gratitude.
According to a few online dictionaries, gratitude is a sense of appreciation or a feeling of thankfulness. That was all they had to offer. No long or complicated backstory about where the word came from or its usage history (from Latin: gratusmeaning grateful).
So, we’re going to have to dig a bit deeper. But for now, not too deep. There are is harrowing amount of books on gratitude out there. And podcasts. And youTube videos. I’m plowing through a lot of that and will report back.
Let’s look at these guys for right now:
Robert Emmons PhD, one of the world’s leading experts on the scientific study of gratitude, asserts that there are at least two components to gratitude:
An affirmation that there is goodness and good things, we’ve received gifts and benefits
A recognition that the source of this goodness is outside of ourselves.
Benedictine monk Br David Steindl-Rast, asserts gratitude has two important qualities:
Recognition of the value of something beyond its monetary worth
That this recognition is freely offered
That is a lot to digest. Without getting too deep into philosophy or scientific study (and you’d be amazed at how many there are), this is what we’ll use to forward our understanding:
GRATITUDE: A sense of appreciation or thankfulness recognizing that
There is goodness
It exists outside of us
It is beyond monetary value
It is freely offered
The scientific study of gratitude is only just old enough to buy a drink legally in the US. It’s considered part of positive psychology, a branch of study introduced in 1998. And it has exploded. It’s hard to keep track of all of the research showing that a regular practice of gratitude has long term positive effects on the health and well-being of humans. There are studies focusing on gratitude and its effect on overall well-being, physical health, mental health, depression, pain relief, sleep, ability to cope with stress, grief, and anxiety—to name a few.
And here’s the catch: it’s so easy. All you have to do is keep a gratitude journal. Every night before bed (or when you wake up) write down 3-5 things that you’re grateful for. That’s it. I guarantee it takes less than 2 minutes. You never have to go back and read it. Your spelling can be atrocious. Your handwriting can be illegible. You can write it on a post it, on the back of a take-out menu. You can use a fancy journal, a date book, or a small spiral assignment book. That makes no difference. The only important part is that you do it every day.
A ground-breaking 2005 study by Martin Seligman (the founder of positive psychology) determined that participants noted a higher sense of well-being after one week of gratitude journaling, but really started to hit their peak after 6 months of continued daily practice.
So, how about this.
Just start tonight.
No build up. No, think about it and get back to me.
Pop a pen and some paper by your bed (or download an app, if you must). Get the fancy notebook. Whatever will help you along.
Start writing.
Here’s mine for today:
I’m grateful for a foggy morning on the river
I’m grateful for my friends who brought me surprise snacks tonight.
I’m grateful for friends that came to play art today and brought snacks.
I’m grateful for the people who make youTube tutorials
I’m grateful for niece and nephew pictures I was texted today.