Resolutions suck.
Resolutions are you looking at all the things you don’t dig about yourself, then demanding that you change that by simply slipping into a new persona at the stroke of midnight.
What
The
Eff?
Whose idea are these resolutions anyway and why have we gone along with it for so long?
They’re stupid.
New Year's resolutions make us feel bad about ourselves by setting us up to fail.
So, like, at a randomly assigned time, I will cease with all of my bad habits, I will fight my sweet tooth and the gravity that pulls me into my Instagram feed, I will miraculously feel inspired to exercise several times a day, after decades of being a slob I will automatically put things away?
I call shenanigans.
I don’t want to write the same list of shit I that I write almost every year ( I just found one hidden in an unfinished notebook).
This year is all about intention.
While resolutions tend to be rigid and outcome based with a focus on external markers, intentions offer the opportunity to journey along a path or through a practice.
Intentions afford you forgiveness if you stray from that path you create for yourself.
For example:
Resolution: I will lose 10 pounds. No more junk food. Gym every day.
Intention: I will listen to and honor my body when it tells me what it needs to feel strong and healthy.
Can you see how that subtle shift impacts how you think? The resolution is practically a regime that must be obeyed, while the intention is a mindset to be embraced.
Try another one:
Resolution: House/studio/office/kitchen to be kept clean at all times.
Intention: I will cultivate an awareness of the objects around me and the spaces I inhabit including how they affect me and vice versa.
You can’t just change who you are overnight. It doesn’t work that way. Your current habits took a long time to become ingrained and automatic. They like where they live and would rather not be evicted, thank you very much. By resolving to kick them to the curb, you’re more likely to encourage them dig in.
Setting an intention creates a bigger picture for you to inhabit. It’s more of a guiding light and less of a to-do list.
You know what’s even more drag than a New Year’s resolution? A whole list of them.
Take it easy on yourself, for crying out loud.
If you feel moved to make a change, find one thing and really explore it.
Not sure how to go about this?
It’s cool, I’m here to help. With a 10 to 15 minutes time investment over the next few days, you can clarify a guiding intention to carry with you through 2022. Or to the summer solstice, or your birthday, or until whichever time you feel called to set a new intention for yourself.
We’re going to start with some fun (!) and easy (!) journal exercises. Grab a pen, notebook, and a beverage of choice.
Reflect back on your 2021 (yes, it has been a long year). (I like to take a quick scroll through my photo library.)
What were your big wins for the year?
What about some of the small victories?
This is a perfect chance to brag on how hard you worked to achieve these goals or even to express disbelief that your cockamamie ideas actually worked/came to fruition. Luxuriate here. Take a bath in how freaking awesome you are. This may be your last chance to indulge in this bliss, so go hard, relive every last juicy detail of your prowess and your amazing ability to human with so much aplomb in such a crazy world.
OK, now, it’s time to Monday morning quarterback what didn’t work. Look atand list a few of your losses.
Where did you stumble, fumble or drop the ball?1
How could you have avoided, responded differently or been better prepared for the situations?
What gifts, tools, lessons did you earn from these?
What surprised you most about the year?
We’re leaving it here for today.
I’ll be back in your inbox tomorrow for the next step.
Look at me using sportsball metaphors like I know what I’m doing with them.
Exactly what I needed, thanks! Time to throw out my draconian list of “must do’s in 2022 or I am not worthy to exist” which was already making me dread the new year.